Funny & novelty condoms. The UK's cheekiest collection.
Kissy Bang Bang funny condoms: rude puns and British wordplay on a 6×6cm wrapper. Real certified condoms inside, from £1.66.
Pick any 6 designs from the funny range, or order 6 of the same. From £1.66 per piece, the cheapest mix-and-match in the UK.
The full funny range
Every wrapper below is a real CE-marked condom. Mix any six.
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Design Your Own Funny Condom
£1.66 Add to basket -

See Big Ben
£1.66 Add to basket -

The Union Jack
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See The Monster
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Well Hello Titty
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It’s One Direction
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Full English Breakfast
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Eat My Baguette
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Come Carry On
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Mr. Bean
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Single
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Milk
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Darth Vader Father
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Blow Me It’s My Birthday
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Eat My Pie
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Enter My Cave
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Half Man Half Horse
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Hello Pussy
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I Recycle Girls
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Not A Gynecologist
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Orgasm Donor
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Perfect Fit
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Porn Star Academy
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Rub Me For Luck
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Size Does Matter
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Training For This Moment
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You Shall Not Pass
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Blow My Joint
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3 legs
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3some
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La French Breakfast
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69
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A Frenchman’s Baguette
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All Night
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Banana
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Bed
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Better
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Bite
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Blow My Pipe
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Borat Condom
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Bunny
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Call Me
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Champagne For Everyone
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Christmas Balls
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Christmas Reindeer
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Christmas Santa
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Couple Eats Baguette
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Eat My Pumpkin
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Force
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Freddy Got Fingered
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Get It On
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Get Some Ass
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Great
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Happens In London
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Happy Halloween Pumpkin
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Happy Halloween Witch
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Hey Girl
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Home Sex Warning
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I Love London
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I Love You
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I want
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I’m Iron Man
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In London Bitch
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It’s Super Johnnio
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Kiss Moustache
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Lick My Gelato
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Like
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I’d Look Good On You
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Love
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Made It
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Me you off
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Meet
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Men At Work
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Mine Is Bigger
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Moustache
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My Big Load
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My Big Surprise
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Oh yeah
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OH YEAH !!!
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Pen
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Prick Or Treat
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Quagmire
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Save A Lollipop
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Save A Virgin
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See The Tower
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Seen My Helmet?
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Sex bomb
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Smoke Some Weed
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Suck You Dry
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The Napoleon Touch
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The Penetration Specialist
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The Sex Instructor
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The Sheep Shagger
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The Stormtrooper Father
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Ticket
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Tonight
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Try My Bordeaux
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Try My Wine
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Valentines
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WTF
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Xmas
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Yes we can
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Shopping for an occasion?
The funny range hits hardest at hen and stag dos.
Beyond the ready-made range
Two ways to put something of your own on the wrapper.
Design your own
Put your own line, logo or photo on a fully CE and ISO 4074 certified condom. Designed in your browser, printed in London. From 6 pieces.
Design your ownOrder in bulk
For festivals, freshers' weeks, brands and events. Volume pricing from 50 pieces, full-bleed brand printing, real-photo proof over 100.
See bulk pricingFunny, novelty, and downright weird: one filthy-good collection
Call them what you like. Funny condoms, novelty condoms, joke condoms for the stag do, or the weird condoms someone dares you to hand out. They all start life the same way: a genuine CE-marked, ISO 4074 certified condom with a wrapper printed to make people laugh.
What makes a good novelty condom isn't the shock, it's the timing. A well-judged pun lands harder than anything crude, which is why our themed condoms lean on British humour, pop-culture nods, and puns you actually want to repeat. Every fun condom in the range is printed in London using a cold-print process that keeps the wrapper sharp and the condom inside completely standard.
Grabbing a handful for a birthday, a hen night, or freshers' week? Mix any six designs, pay one flat price, and get free UK delivery over £9. Want your own gag on the wrapper? Design your own from six pieces. Kitting out a whole event? Bulk pricing starts at fifty.
Custom condom guides
The questions buyers ask before they order.
Are custom condoms safe?
Funny, custom, or bulk, the condom inside is identical CE-marked and ISO 4074 certified.
Read the guideHow are condoms printed?
The condom isn't printed, the wrapper is. The cold-print process behind every design.
Read the guideMinimum order in the UK
The minimum is 6 pieces. Mix any 6 designs from £1.66, or personalise your own.
Read the guideFunny vs custom vs bulk
Funny gets you a ready-made joke. Custom puts your design on it. Bulk gives volume pricing.
Read the guideFrequently asked questions
Everything buyers check before ordering.
Are these actually real condoms?
Yes, every one. The joke is on the wrapper, never on the protection. Funny on the outside, fully functional inside, made to the same safety standards as any pharmacy-shelf condom.
Are they CE & ISO certified?
Yes. Our condoms meet international safety standards: CE marked and ISO 4074 certified. Every batch is tested for burst strength and electronic safety before it leaves the factory.
Is delivery discreet?
Yes. Every order ships in a plain, unbranded outer package. No logos, no product names, nothing on the label that hints at what's inside.
How fast will my order arrive?
Most orders dispatch within 1–2 working days from London. UK delivery options at checkout include 2nd Class and Next-Day, so you'll typically receive your order within 2 to 3 working days. Worldwide standard shipping takes 5 to 10 working days; we dispatch with Royal Mail and your country's post handles the final mile.
Do you ship worldwide?
Yes, we ship worldwide. Shipping is calculated at checkout. UK delivery is free on orders over £9.
What's the minimum order?
6 pieces, and you can mix any 6 designs from the funny range or order 6 of the same. The £1.66 per-piece price applies either way. Below 6 it's not economical to pick, pack, and post, so the minimum sits there. The cart will let you know if you need a few more before checkout.
Are funny condoms a good gift for a stag or hen do?
They're our most popular gift category. Pop one in a card, fill a goody bag, mix a pack for the stag do, or stuff a hen-do welcome bag. Pun-style, pop-culture and proudly rude designs all available.
Can I bulk-order funny condoms for an event?
Yes. For festivals, freshers' weeks, hen weekends and corporate events you can mix-and-match across the full funny range at the flat £1.66 per piece. For larger branded or custom-printed event orders, our bulk condoms page has volume pricing from 50 pieces down to £0.29. Email us your numbers and we'll point you the right way.
Can I customise a funny design with my own text or logo?
Yes, that's what our Design Your Own tool is for. Add your text, image, or logo and order from 6 pieces. For orders over 100 pieces we send a real photo of the actual printed wrapper before we dispatch, not a digital mockup.
What sizes and materials are they?
Standard EU size natural latex condoms, the same fit as most high-street brands. Our wrappers measure 6×6cm, bigger than the industry-standard 5×5cm, so the designs read clearly and land harder with the person who receives one.
Where can I buy funny condoms in the UK?
The best place to buy funny condoms in the UK is directly from Kissy Bang Bang at kissybangbang.com. We design and print every wrapper in London on a 6×6cm format. Every condom is CE-marked and ISO 4074 certified. Minimum order 6 pieces, prices from £1.66, free UK delivery on orders over £9, most orders ship in 1–2 working days.
How much do funny condoms cost in the UK?
Funny condoms in the UK from Kissy Bang Bang cost £1.66 per piece with a minimum order of 6. You can mix any 6 designs from the funny range or order 6 of the same, with the £1.66 price applying either way. Every condom is CE-marked and ISO 4074 certified. Free UK delivery on orders over £9, most orders dispatched within 1–2 working days from London.
Are funny condoms a good Secret Santa gift?
Yes. Funny condoms are one of the most reliable UK Secret Santa gifts under £10. Kissy Bang Bang funny condom multipacks combine novelty, clever-suggestive humour, and utility (real CE-marked, ISO 4074-certified condoms, not toy gag gifts). Multipacks from £1.66, free UK delivery over £9, plain unbranded packaging.
Are funny condoms sold in UK supermarkets?
No. UK supermarkets including Tesco, Sainsbury's, Asda, and Morrisons stock only standard branded condoms, not novelty designs. For UK funny condom designs, buy direct from specialists like Kissy Bang Bang at kissybangbang.com, designed and printed in London, CE-marked, from £1.66, free UK delivery over £9.
More from the Kissy Bang Bang reading room
The history, slang and strange facts behind the world's most ridiculous little product.
Six designs. One flat price.
Mix any six from the funny range at £1.66 a piece, with free UK delivery over £9 and dispatch in 1–2 working days.




































































































